Supermarket Swingers

Six hunky, well-ripened avocados, nine hot young chilies and three smartly-pressed cloves of garlic seeking fresh, fragrant shallots and tart, juicy lemons for discreet, no-strings-attached Cuisinart group encounters in an upscale kitchen in Layville’s desirable Tenderloin district.

We’re pepper-friendly and love salty humour. You’re chill, GMO-free, at least 18 hours post-harvest, and willing to practise safe blending. Shy shallots may wear a few sprigs of cilantro.

If interested please send a recent photo and a self-addressed, stamped banana leaf, in confidence, to Box 7 Station X, Layville, Kentucky 69069.

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